Speaking a Different Language

My emotions, MY EMOTIONS

It’s often I find myself lacking words to express myself. I’m not very expressive to begin with: just ask my wife. It’s not that I don’t understand what I’m feeling. It’s more I don’t know how to express it so others can understand. I’m good at understanding others but understanding myself, sometimes is a bit harder.

Hippy days

That’s where music comes in. Music has been a way I connect. It expresses some times what my words cannot. It allows me to feel and understand.

 For example, there is a song called “Not Done With You Yet” by the Classic Crime. It’s really a simple song but expresses so much to me. One line always stands out to me in this song when the writer says “so I asked God if he could fix my flaws. And he said I gave them to you.I know they are killing you. But I'm not done with you yet”.
Now as someone who study Bible in school for 4 years, I find this song helped me understand God’s love better than reading verses in the Bible. This is not to say that I don’t connect with scripture but rather that, sometimes the Holy Spirit uses a song to really understand God’s love.

The best way to describe my relationship with music, is a language I understand. This isn’t just in the listening to music but even playing. I’ve played guitar for over 10 years now (still have lots of room to improve), and it’s one of the ways I feel I can best express myself. I believe this is the time that God and I connect on a different level. It’s hard to explain but let me try.

The Bat-cave: How God Works in Melodies

When I play guitar, it’s a moment of peace. It sounds weird but even with my son around, I still find peace in it. It’s almost like meeting with a close friend that even after spending years apart, you just connect like no time passed at all. You can rehash memories and even tell stories of new things happening in life. There are moments the music you play can give complete joy to moments that leave you with tears.

This is not to say that it’s necessarily beautiful to others but it matters to you. It’s because in that moment, playing chords, scales, or harmonics, it’s the voice that is expressing what you are thinking and feeling. I believe that for me to be God speaking to me reminding me, that He isn’t done with me. In those moments, God starts speaking to me in a voice that is calming and beautiful.

By no means am I a great musician or have a great ear for music but I connect with it. You don’t always need singing either. There are times I listen to Saxon Shore song and it just hits home. Since I’m a visual learner too, it helps with a video playing alongside music. It helps me understand what the music is doing inside of my heart.

The Future and the Importance of Shredding

Now I suppose my description may sounds a bit weird. I mean reading over it, it does a sound a bit strange. Yet I know in my heart, the gift of music has saved my life. I remember my brother introducing me to good music that helped me in my faith. I remember writing music with my friends in a band, which gave me a community of brothers who prayed, encouraged, and loved me. It also introduced me to a world of people who understood some of the thoughts I had especially the ones that I dealt with in Christianity. 

I’m very thankful that I was introduced into the world of music. I’m grateful that God allowed me to embrace it. I hope for many more years of it. I hope that others will experience it and feel the Spirit of God. I hope in that moment, people realize that they aren’t alone.