This is the part of the blog where I talk about Batman

The Dark Knight

I'm often seen wearing clothing that has the bat symbol on it. If I'm being honest, most of the time I don't buy it. Don't let this detour you from this point: I love the character of Batman. I remember my brother Ian and I watching the animated show after school. I remember watching the 60's show on vacation because, well it's Batman. Later on of course I was able to watch Tim Burton's Batman movies that lead into the not so good Joel Shumaucker films. 

Eventually Batman returned in the infamous Dark Knight Trilogy. Between that there was also the beautiful Arkham Video games, where you get to be Batman. If you weren't able to tell, I'm definitely into comic culture at this point, so the next step logically is to read comics.

I read (and own) many great Batman titles: Batman: Long Halloween, Batman: Hush, Batman: Prey, Batman: The Court of Owls, and lastly the classic The Dark Knight Returns. I will say this about comic books; they are an amazing form of writing and art. As someone who is a visual person, it's like reading a script as you see people performing what you are reading. It's a cool form of writing that I do feel is under appreciated because it's labeled as "childish". That is for another time but comics are really cool.

Why Batman?

It's often said about Batman that he's too popular. There is some truth to it if I'm being honest. Most people like Batman for his sheer fighting skills. I mean if anyone watched the movie Batman V Superman most people walked out talking about the warehouse scene. It's just brutal and shows that he's not some guy in a Bat costume.

I get asked by other comic book and movie fans, why Batman? I mean literally you got Superman who is all powerful, Flash who runs so fast he can literally go through time, and Martian Man-hunter who can read minds and mess with people. Why the heck would you choose someone like Batman?

Some people argue that he's a human and that's what makes him cool but I think you could argue that with a few characters. I like Batman for a couple of reasons. I love that he's a detective and uses his mind, his conviction to do what's right, and lastly how he is broken but endures on.

Great Minds!

Batman is considered the "World's Greatest Detective" in the comics. Although that is debatable, he's a very smart man. I love that factor about his character. Bruce Wayne, spent time before he became Batman to learn from great minds about how to use head. Often like I said earlier, people just think of Batman being a brute and beating people to a pulp. Batman does do this but Batman also uses his head. 

One of the greatest Batman stories shows that Batman prepares for battle because sometimes you need to be ahead of the enemy. Even if this enemy happens to be the Justice League. 

In the JLA story, Tower of Babel, Batman had plans on each member of the Justice League. Obviously he was over-confident (one of his many flaws) and someone used them against the Justice League. Now some would argue this is cruel but the rationale makes complete sense. If one of the members went rogue (which never happens...eye roll) they would be able to take them down. 

Batman also shows his minds brilliance when he takes on people like the Riddler. I mean the whole gimmick of the Riddler is to challenge Batman's mind. An example of this is in the story Hush, Batman in the end deduces that Riddler was a bigger part of Hush's plot to take Batman down. Even in the midst of the Riddler figuring out who Batman was under the mask, Batman not phased mentions that him now knowing The Riddler used the Lazarus Pit (something that heals people or brings them back from the dead) that Ra Al Ghul would send assassins after him to kill him. Batman not only figured out the main guy behind the plot against him but also now has the cards in his hand to keep his identity a secret. Batman uses his knowledge to his advantage and this is only one example. Batman's mind is pretty awesome.

No killing...

"People need dramatic examples to shake them out of apathy and I can’t do that as Bruce Wayne. As a man I’m flesh and blood, I can be ignored, I can be destroyed, but as a symbol, as a symbol I can be incorruptible. I can be everlasting."
Bruce Wayne

The "no killing" rule Batman has annoys people. I think they think it's insane that he doesn't kill people like the Joker. I mean the guy literally just kills without remorse. I mean most people would think the worlds a better place, right?!

Yet Batman holds to this standard, that justice is not won by killing, but rather by letting them go through the proper channels. Obviously people know Gotham isn't the best city in the world, so of course it's an ever revolving door. Yet in spite of this, Batman holds to this conviction.

I love that about the character. He does what he thinks is right. He doesn't get swayed by others but thinks only of what he views as right. Some would argue that beating the tar out of bad guys is kind of messed up, but he realizes killing them makes him just as bad as them.

Right or wrong. Agree or disagree. I love the fact he sticks to his guns. I think this has been helpful in my journey as a person. Even if people disagree, it's okay to think differently. Batman doesn't feel the need to defend his view, unless broken by another (because killing is wrong). For me, much of my life was spent being afraid of speaking what I thought.

I mean even just saying I read comics is something that makes me think people might think I'm a child. The thing is, I see guys writing these comics, especially Batman, and him holding to what he thinks. For me, that means the world because it makes me feel okay with being different.

It has impacted my faith. I can now hold to a view and be okay if it doesn't line up with others. To me, that changes my world. In a way, Batman was used to help me see that. I like the fact that he does what he thinks is right. It helps me see that sometimes we have to do something with conviction.

 We endure

One of the greatest quotes of Batman comes from the Nolan-verse Alfred. He says to Batman "Endure, Master Wayne. Take it. They'll hate you for it, but that's the point of Batman. He can be the outcast. He can make the choice that no one else can make, the right choice"(The Dark Knight).

This quote has always stood out to me. Batman is a character who is constantly pushing himself to go beyond his limits. His goal is to continue his mission. One might ask what is his mission? His mission is to protect Gotham and not allow crimes like what happen to him as a child. This means he has to sacrifice and endure trials.

Now I will admit, Batman has a bit of a messiah complex. I think that speaks a lot into who he is as a person. He's broken, not perfect, and human. I can relate to that extremely. That's why I needed Jesus. What I take from how Batman acts is the fact that he fights for what is good and right. He doesn't give up because things get terrible.

For example, even in the midst of a massive earthquake and his city being destroyed (check out No Man's Land), Batman pushes to get order back to the city. At first, he lost faith, but then he got back up and fought for his city. The rest of the story arc of "No Man's Land" is a journey of the Dark Knight restoring order and relationships. 

That's Batman though. He's a man who endures trial in order to hopefully see a day of peace and restoration. Batman may be flawed in his thinking but still is willing to push himself for others.

The Hero Gotham needs...

I realize as I finish this up, how much of a nerd I am but it's just my love for characters who I can relate. Batman is more than just a dude who is super jacked and could beat most people (with prep time... of course). He's a man who holds to his beliefs and acts accordingly to those beliefs.

As a Christian, it inspires me. What I believe and my actions that follow are important. I shouldn't be talking about something unless I'm willing to follow through on it. So often that is something that happens in life. I talk a good game and I end up looking dumb or as a hypocrite because I don't follow through. 

That's what makes Batman so inspiring. He's a man who holds to his convictions. He does what he believes is right, even if others don't understand. He does it because he believes he will be helping others. This is why people are inspired by Batman. He's a symbol of someone who stands up for what he believes and follows through. 

Yes he may be fictional but even a character can inspire others. So how much more can a real person actually inspire others. Batman reminds me of the importance of what I believe and that I need to allow it to seep into my actions. Who knew that Jesus could use Batman to grow in my understanding faith.

Simple Gospel?

Simplicity of the Gospel

Is the gospel simple? If someone asked me this question, I'd respond with a yes and no. I believe it is easy for us because we are to believe it. Sure, it's work but it's a lot easier than what my boy Jesus had to go through. Yes, Jesus was willing, but he also had to deal with human and spiritual pain.

Remember for me what I have to believe and follow. Jesus had to be beaten, verbally abused, and left alone (spiritually, as well as physically). The easiness of this gospel for us came at the price of Jesus. Jesus had to bear all of mankind's sin upon the cross. 

He felt God's wrath. God's wrath has to be pretty bad because remember God hates sin. It's like Batman's feelings towards guns but a million times worse (not even Batman punching someone can amount to God's power). I mean God's hate is shown in the story of Noah. He literally got rid of almost everything. 

God in his infinite knowledge knew his hatred towards sin meant he had to do something to save man. God knew that we couldn't save ourselves. This is when a desert handy-man named Jesus comes in to our story.

Jesus Christ: Pain and Gain

So this is where Jesus comes into play. This was God's way of making things right for man. Jesus Christ was born of a virgin, did miracles, and taught really powerful stuff. The plan was for him to come and teach the kingdom of heaven and then have him die a death to end all death. 

Let's be honest, that sounds really poetic, but also kind of awful from a human perspective. Well during this process leading to his death, Jesus was beaten, mocked, spit on, and then placed on a cross with two other criminals. 

Once again, from a human perspective, this sucks. What makes this worse is the fact that Jesus is utterly alone. When I say alone; I'm talking God the Father has turned away from Him. Unlike us, who always has God, Jesus experiences Hell. He doesn't have God with him, He's alone. 

This is the part we applaud 

I imagine this is what Hell is, the absence of God. Not only that but Jesus experiences a physical death, too. He is in the grave for 3 days. So this Jesus fellow has experienced a lot of pain, suffering, and loneliness. Yet God in his great mercy resurrects Jesus and Jesus is back in his proper place. Except now, He stands between us and that wrath of God. 

Why do this? Why suffer? Why does God give a crap about someone like me? God's desire is to rescue mankind. Jesus, who is the human embodiment of God, loved mankind so greatly that He gave himself up to all the pain and suffering for saving mankind. 

He thought about the billions of people on this earth. It makes you think. He cares about each person. He cares about the lives of people. Although it seems like kind of a crazy process to get to where we are, it was necessary to appease God.

So the question was: Is the gospel simple? Yes, in a way but also complex. That's the beauty of it. It's a simple complexity. It's simple for us to just believe and follow Christ with our hearts. He gives freely. Maybe all that's left to say is thank you. 

I'll be honest, most days it doesn't feel like enough. Yet, maybe that's why we need to remind ourselves to be thankful every day.

Goodbye to our Captain

For the love of the game...

Yesterday, David Wright unofficially announced that he will play one more game at Citi Field in September. Mr. Wright spoke and gave thanks to many people while holding back tears. At the age of 35, no one would assume that their career would be over. These days you can play baseball into your early 40's. Yet, this wouldn't be the case for David Wright.

As I listened in on his press conference, I felt a sadness fill me. It wasn't because I thought it was a bad decision, but rather because of what the man meant to the Mets organization, as well as myself. He was a Met fan and got to play for the team he loved. He was always a Met. He thrived in New York when so many athletes get bashed on in New York (see Eli Manning or Carlos Beltran). It's really hard to say anything bad about the guy.

It's been extremely difficult imaging that Wright will no longer wear a Mets jersey, as a player (here's to hoping he becomes a coach). I was really hoping he'd get a World Series because he's just one of those guys who deserves it. I mean look at his career as a Met: a lot of disappointment. Yet this guy wanted to win with the Mets because he thought the fans deserved it.

David Wright reminds me of what I love about baseball. I love the way it feels when you hit the ball and you know you are getting on base. I love the way it feels to make a diving play that saves a run. I love when you beat a batter in a long battle as a pitcher. I love the thrill of stealing a base. I love the community of the team and how we come around one another if we are struggling. I love the way it feels when you celebrate with your team after a homer . I love sliding because it was fun. There is one moment that still stands out in my mind of David Wright: the moment I knew he felt the same way I did when playing baseball!

It was 2015, the Mets were making a run for the playoffs, against their rival, the Nationals. David Wright was on first base and Cespedes was hitting. Cespedes hits the ball well in the gap and Wright is hustling. Wright was waved home and he beats the throw and scores. Wright who is a player who had been around for awhile at this point, fist pumps in genuine excitement. He was excited because the team was winning. It wasn't about him, it was about the team. There are not many guys like that in baseball anymore.

I will miss Wright. He's a great player, but most of all a really great guy. He loved baseball. He loved the Mets. He loved his teammates. He loved the fans and made sure that we knew. Thank you David Wright!  Once a Met, always a Met.

Maybe I'm Wrong

The Good Child

I was a middle son

Between two wayward ones

I was more deserving of my parent's love

-As Cities Burn

Growing up as a middle child comes with some benefits. I guess it's really not about me being a middle child as much as growing up with a brother who has a big personality. My older brother is very much the opposite of me. He is outgoing and adventurous. 

Please don't take this as me being self-deprecating. This is me just being honest about growing up. My brother took risk. I love that about him. He is someone who was just okay with himself. The thing is with risk, you have to deal with some consequences. 

Now my brother would do things and I'd watch. I believe this is what my younger brother did as well. We watch my older brother do things and we tried our best to learn from it. So if he got in trouble for something, we'd lodge that in our mental library for a later time. I wasn't perfect but I learned when my parents would say no or I saw my brother do something risky, I would avoid it. 

It was easy to follow suit growing up. When I was told "no", it really meant no. I'd avoid it because I didn't want to get in trouble or hurt. Needless to say, I took things my parents, teachers, and pastors said as scripture (in my mind). That had more to do with me and less the people who were teaching me. This mentality did lead to what I believe was my struggle with expressing what I thought. I just wanted to be right and not so much question things. 

The Enlightenment 

Fast forward years later. I'm now a college student, paying thousands of dollars I didn't have to get a degree that really didn't do as much as I was hoping. I went to a Bible College. I will not name them (because my fear of being sued) but I'm sure people will figure it out. I'm sitting in classes and listening to different professors and taking everything in. Yet every now and then I hear things that kind of bother me but like when I was a kid. I just took their word for it. These are some ideas like women being pastors, if Genesis was literal, you know church stuff.

Let's be honest. These professors know their stuff. Why question what they say? 

So I went through a lot of years of college never questioning things like women leadership in churches, homosexuality, tithing, worship music, if Genesis was literal or figurative, etc. Once again I went back to the idea that all the smart people teaching me were right. Who was I to question these men who have been pastors and have the title Doctor.

It's funny how some people can change perspective. I met this guy named Josh. He challenged me. He challenged my faith. He didn't allow me to get by on my verbal vomit of what I had heard in class that morning. Josh didn't think like my professors. Josh was dangerous or I'm sure that's what people might have thought. Josh was also the person who inspired me to check out a church, which also changed me. His words about the pastor was "this guy gets it". 

This would forever change my perspective on what it means to give. It changed my mind of what church should be. I mean it was life changing. 

Then I would talk to my older brother about theological thought and really discuss it. It was never a fight but more of a discussion. There is something to say about people like Josh, my pastor and friend Gary, and my brother Ian. They help me remodel my faith but most of all allowed me to think critically.

They didn't let me just become a person who read a book and just agreed with it. They challenged my thinking. The best thing of all that they did is asked, "what do you think"? This challenged me to study, to learn, and to come to my own conclusion. I began starting to admit I could be wrong and really reexamine my faith. For the first time in life, I started feeling better about just embracing what I thought God was telling me.

You were never alone

It's funny because when you start asking questions, you start to see other people are wondering the same thing. I think one of the greatest fears as Christians, is we will think something that will make us a heretic and we are the only ones who think that way. The truth is, we should be willing to take time to figure out truth (if possible). 

I mentioned in one of my past post, that it's also important to listen and not try to force an opinion. I think as Christians, we believe that we can take the place of the Holy Spirit to convict. We somehow got to a place where discussion is more about conversion than really hearing someones heart. I know I could be better at just sitting with someone and listening. 

In the end, if you have something that you think. Ask the question. I can almost say with complete conviction, someone else is thinking or thought it. Let's begin allowing ourselves to be okay with possibly being wrong and lets listen. We might actually learn something.

Rethinking Christianity: Consequences of Asking More Questions

Breaking Bad: New Way of Thinking

I recently listened to The Bad Christian podcast, which if you don't know much about it, is a podcast of three men who were looking to get more authentic with faith. The podcast doesn't always involve faith topics but diet, technology, etc.

This particular podcast stood out to me. It had a transgender man named Austen Hartke. Austen was speaking about his book and talking a bit about his story. I'll be the first to say I don't have much experience with transgender individuals and I figured it'd be good for me to listen.

Throughout the conversation it really made me quite uncomfortable. Austen talked a lot about his journey and how God was speaking to him in the midst of this journey. Now remember, I was brought up in church and went to a conservative Bible College, this kind of was pissing on what I had learned. Yet however uncomfortable I felt, I became more and more intrigued that I couldn't help but being drawn in. 

At one point, one of the podcast interviewers asked a question about what he identifies more with, being transgender or a Christian. I had thought it would be his sexuality if I'm being honest. Austen said that he identified more with being a Christian than a transgender man.

That statement hit me like a truck. Everything that I thought, heard, or even pretended to believe, was just thrown out the window. Was this the beginning of my fall into deconstructing my beliefs until I hit rock bottom? Probably not, but it was the beginning to my journey into shutting up and listening and being open to conversation.

Stop, Listen, and ask questions

Like I mentioned above, I had been in the church my whole life, and gone to a christian college. I literally have a B.S. in Bible (it's kind of funny writing that on here). I mean I've read countless books on faith, theology, and how to walk through a day as a christian. I mean I'll be honest, I thought I got the christian thing down pretty well.

The fact of the matter, is this journey had begun during my internship. My pastor and friend, Gary had challenged my thinking on a few occasions. I like to give him credit for me rethinking about what it means to "do ministry". I believe this really helped me get to where I am now.

By no means am I going to be bashing the church or Christianity, because I believe that it's very important to our world and my life. I just think maybe we've kind of gotten a little more political and stuck in our ways.

My understanding of who God is in my life has changed. My understanding of His love and grace surpasses my understanding each day. In the midst of my understanding his grace and love, it has allowed me to stop, listen and ask questions. 

One of the things that I appreciate about my parents is they did take time to answer my questions and explain things to the best of their knowledge. God had used them to teach me that sometimes it's good to sit and listen. 

This is something that as the church and I'll go as far as society isn't very good at. We can listen until we disagree, then we have to push back. Don't get me wrong, it's go to push back, but there is a better way. Most push back is a emotional response to us disagreeing and trying to be right. What I am trying to say, is even when we disagree, we should sit and listen. 

It's when we sit and listen that we really can understand someone else and their ideals. I think people are more comfortable when we don't speak right away and ask questions. Let's be honest, there is a lot about life, we don't fully understand. We've gotten these ideas and preconceived thoughts that drive our thinking. Prime example, can be seen in music. My friend might say, I should listen to Taylor Swifts new music, but how I feel about her music (and her personally) it may deter me from hearing a decent album. Just a disclaimer, I don't really like her music but it's the best thing I could come up with.

When we listen it allows us to have a good conversation. It allows us to ask questions. I mean we see questions used in the Bible. We even see Jesus ask questions (Who do you think I am? Just one example). I think when we are interacting with new ideas it's good to take time and talk to someone. This means not accusing, pushing our agenda, but questions and trying to understand. How are we ever going to learn something unless we ask questions. 

By no means do I mean you have to agree with someone. I believe we can disagree and yet still be okay with one another. I mean I'm still friends with my buddy Josh even though he likes the Yankees (yes I'm a sad Mets fan). I think it's okay to be friends with people who don't agree with you. Actually if your friends just agree with everything you say, I'd say someone's lying. 

I guess what the whole point of me even writing this is to say, we need to open ourselves up to listening to others. It's time to open our ears to different ideas, beliefs, and Yankee fans (I couldn't help myself). Like I said, you don't have to agree, but I believe Jesus wants us to listen. He may even teach you something new and change the way you think. I believe Jesus is always teaching us something new! 

So please Stop, listen, and ask questions. It will definitely make you a lifelong learner. 

Finding Nimmo

Sitting on the bench

Baseball season is one of my favourite times of the year. Being a Mets fan, makes people scratch their heads. Knowing the Mets track record, most people assume they will disappoint. Yet being a Mets fan, there is a part of us that this deep hope.


But this isn't about the Mets in particular. There is a player on the Mets named Brandon Nimmo. Right now, he's an off the bench kind of player. Yet he's a decent player, probably better than what most bench players.


The issue he is having currently is that the Mets have a crowded outfield. The outfield has some awesome players as well but this means Nimmo has to wait. Nimmo is waiting on his chance to be a starter. He may have to wait all season or maybe be traded in order to start. Baseball really is about making the most of the opportunity you are given. Yet sometimes like life, you just have to wait.

Waiting room

Waiting is probably one of the biggest struggles of every American. It's possible it's a worldly problem but America is like the best example of having no patience. Take driving for example: when people get stuck in traffic, they will weave between lanes hoping to get to where they need. Another example, cell phones. We no longer have to wait to obtain information and we even get annoyed when we can't get it quick enough.


We live in a culture that doesn't understand the importance of waiting. This pokes it's ugly head into other parts of our lives. For example when going through trials or seasons of our life that aren't where we'd like to be. I call this the waiting room.


We all know what it's like to wait for the doctor in the waiting room. You sit in this room that is normally either way to cold or hot, with some kind of news playing, and really terrible magazines that most people don't read. I mean if you find the occasional Sports Illustrated from 2013, you are lucky. Needless to say, the waiting room is never fun.


I use to hate it because I was always waiting with anxiety. You go over the scenarios of what could happen in the room. Time seems to slow in the waiting room as well. As you can see, I never was good with doctors because I was usually there just to get shots. I hate shots.


This is what life is like when we are going through seasons of trials and waiting. Most of us will admit we are super impatient. I am definitely one of those people. Only a year ago I experienced having to wait for employment. I had just recently been let go from my job. I had to begin looking for work.


To those of you who understand looking for jobs, this was very hard for me. It was not just a few weeks of being jobless, it was two and half months. I struggled with my racing thoughts of not being good enough and a failure. My faith struggled greatly in this time. I didn't see God. Actually I thought, he did this to me because I did something wrong. Needless to say, my thinking was not clear.

Momma always said to be patience

One of my favorite sections of scripture is Lamentations 3. I love the book but chapter 3 just hits home in my times of doubt. In chapter 3, you get the author writing from a place of defeat. Here is a sample:

"I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall.
I well remember them,
and my soul is downcast within me."
-Lamenations 3:19-20

The reason for the authors defeated spirit is because Jerusalem had just been destroyed and people were placed in exile by the Babylonians. Jerusalem is the Holy City of Israel of God people. Yet, God allowed this to happen to HIS people.


The author mentions all the bad that had happen in the wake of this disaster. Yes, this was due to the peoples sin but remember, in the midst of the disobedient, there were Godly men and women. The author would probably be one of those if we assume it is Jeremiah. Yet just like all those who were wicked, our boy Jerry had to sit in a season of trial.


What's truly beautiful about this book is written in chapter 3:

Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.”

The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;

it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the Lord.
It is good for a man to bear the yoke
while he is young. (Lamentation 3:21-27)


I love it and get chills when I read this part of scripture. Jerry in the midst of questioning God, gets it. He's later mentions that he's not cast off forever and that even in grief, God has compassion (3:31-33). Jerry understands who God is. He understands that God's grace is still within bad situations. Waiting isn't about being punished but more so understanding that God will bring forth his redemption. He will redeem whatever situation we are in. 

Some times we need to be reminded of the fact that God is in control. That when we wait, we see redemption through Christ work. In the book "Detours" Tony Evan's says this, "The key to victory in whatever situation you are facing is not first where you are or what you are going through but rather who is with you while you're there"(75).

God's working in the moments of waiting. Evans speaks about Joseph also being in prison, and getting promoted (75). In the midst of our trials God does prepare us for what's next. He builds us up. We need to understand that when we seek Him in the midst, he answers in strange ways.

In waiting for my job, the Lord prepared me in a new way to being able to find forgiveness. I was harboring so much anger. I was so focused on my frustration of not getting jobs and feeling betrayed, he taught me to forgive. I just remember one day sitting in his presence and He told me to forgive those who I felt betrayed me. Let me tell you, in my current job, people lie, people make mistakes, and I've been more forgiving. Actually, I am able to put my feelings behind me and love them like the father in the prodigal son. It makes me better at my job.

This is a small example of waiting on the Lord and getting to know Him better. When we understand God's heart for us and what he does for us in the midst of different seasons, things aren't too bad. I mean it's easier said then done. Yet really listening for God rather than getting frustrated helps. I mean I took the more negative way but my hope in Him did come through.

Like my boy Nimmo on the Mets, sometimes we have to wait until we see what's coming. Yet in these times, take advantage of what God is giving you. Looking for what God is doing in the midst of a season reminds you his grace is enough.
Now off to my current season of waiting... hopefully I can remember what I wrote.

The Buckner Day's of Summer

Finding something worth doing

I believe it was around 5 or 6 when my parents were wanting me to pursue some type of activity. Well due to my love of the Power Rangers, I thought “why not karate”. I mean how hard it could be, I had been a Power Ranger like 4 Halloween's in a row. Well how my first interaction with Karate ended, was me crying and wanting to leave. In my defense, I’m totally a wimp, I’m afraid of heights, no idea why. It wouldn’t be until years later where God helped me break out of my shell. 

American's Greatest Pastime

My parents went back to the drawing board with the whole extra-circular activities. My mom brought up baseball. I’d like baseball due to my mom. My mom was from Long Island New York, and was a Mets fan. At this point, I was already into baseball due to the Mets, so I tried it. I’m grateful for this moment in my life because baseball had changed my world. I met a lot of my friends through it but not only that, I was good at it. I loved the game. I started in Pony League (or little league). I learned the basics and it seemed like everything just clicked for me in the game. I went on to actually be a really good player. Yet with all my potential, politics ruined it for me. That’s another story for another day. 

It's not just about the game...

Baseball also taught me one of my greatest strengths at the time: compassion. People may not believe this but I truly want to see the best for others. I loved the game of baseball because it taught me how to be compassionate. Baseball is a game of many possible misfortunes. In an instant you can blow a game, lose a streak, or miss an easy ground ball (Sorry Buckner). In those moments, it’s always good to have someone come alongside you and just be there in the moment. I found that was my gifting. 

Regardless of how good or bad, I always wanted to be there for my team. It was important to me that those guys knew that they were not failures. I believe God used this even though I was unaware it was God. It’s like life. We all go through failures. Some of us have messed up relationships, some of us got into things like drugs that messed us up, and some of us are Philadelphia Eagle fans… just kidding of course. In those moments though, I imagine Jesus just sitting with someone. He wouldn’t be sitting there because he wants to gloat but he wants to sit in the suffering with us. He wants to know that He’s there. He wants us to know He understands. 

God

It’s beautiful when you have these moments of compassion. When you see the person just as you see yourself: someone who needs to be loved. In baseball, it was the guy who just needed to know that he mattered regardless of how he was doing. I loved being that guy. Little did I know that was Jesus using me as an instrument of his grace? Sitting in suffering and loving someone through that suffering speaks highly of the God we serve.